Fry on the Bold and Storm… and So Many Other Things

If you’re ever in danger of thinking that you’re a gadget freak who’s gone a phone too far, console and correct yourself by looking closely at Stephen Fry. This renaissance eccentric, one of my faves, is so deeply into the tech of it all that you’ll wonder how he finds any time at all for his acting, writing and film-making. His latest blog post, Gee, One Bold Storm coming up…, is a long, long lovely ramble about the stuff he’s taken with him to New York (it’s his desk you see above), where he is for the next few weeks, and, among many other things, a review of BlackBerry’s new Bold and Storm models.

To cut to the chase, always a sad thing where Fry’s writing is concerned, this is his considered opinion of the Bold:

In short the Bold is a superb evolution of a winning formula (if formulae can be said to evolve): it looks and feels attractive, solid and well-made. The software architecture and hardware design complement each other perfectly. Above all it remains wholly, proudly and properly a BlackBerry. It is, to be sure, no threat to the iPhone except in one regard: devoted BlackBerry users will be less anxious and uncertain than they might have done a month or so ago. They will feel proud, happy and loved once again and all thoughts of moving to iPhone will vanish away.

Happy with the Bold, then. With the Storm? Not so much:

Watching someone writing an email on a Storm is like watching an antelope trying to open a packet of cigarettes….

As an implementation of touchscreen technology the Storm sucks: I’ll go further. The Storm could teach an industrial vacuum pump how to suck. It could teach Linda Lovelace how to suck. It could… you get the idea. It is as if RIM decided to point out to us all the impressive things about the iPhone that we might have missed in our excitement at the more obviously stellar features. How responsive it is, how swift, how smooth, how light and quick on its feet, how instinctive and intuitive, how little you have to think and consider what to do with it.

I dare say some of the judder, lag and jerk will be smoothed out by further software or (more likely) firmware updates, but nothing can take away from the fact that this is the Edsel of smartphones, an absolute smeller from top to bottom.

I hope this is in time for any Santas who are planning to stuff a stocking with things that ring and are not jingle bells.